I just finished The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. In this book she writes about her personal happiness project. She focuses on a different topic every month, such as energy, money, etc. One of her ‘splendid truths’ is that to make others happy, you have to be happy. And vice versa, to make yourself happy, you have to make others happy.

In everyday life, I don’t want to bring others down. I want to lift them up and make them happy. Of course, if I know they are doing the wrong thing or going in a bad direction, I want to help them get on the right track. Helping someone else re-align with what is important may be overrule their immediate happiness. But, I believe this will contribute to their long term well being, or happiness.

And I don’t think that to be a person with deep convictions, you can’t be happy. The picture of the solemn professor who never smiles and meditates on the deep questions of the universe does not always ring true. I know I don’t want to be that. I know that when I’m around someone unhappy, I don’t feel good. And when I’m making others unhappy, especially long-term, I feel horrible. So it’s a cycle. The question is: Do I want unhappiness or happiness, for myself and others?

Of course, I will not always be happy, and that’s okay. But my joy does not depend on my outward circumstances. I can’t choose what will happen to me; I can choose how I react. My goal for this next month of May is to react with joy and gratitude.